• Success Story | Poetry

    Success Story | Poetry

    I used to be afraid

    To ask the boy I was seeing

    To do anything with me and my friends

    Because I knew he’d say no

    His bedroom was our favourite spot

    For us to go

    I used to accept

    The bare minimum and wonder why

    I’d see girls with their dream guy

    And I knew our love wasn’t right but I held on

    I used to force it

    Conversations that weren’t natural

    Trying my best to make us something we were not

    But something that I’d want

    I used to let you

    Hold some sort of power over me

    I found it hard

    To break free

    But now look at me

    I used to think

    I couldn’t live life without you

    It wasn’t love

    It was attachment

    And now I know

    Only time I really think about you

    Is if I’m talking to my friends about you

    Saying how the best thing to do sometimes is let go

    Because if a relationship is toxic

    Maybe that’s why God blocks it

    And you can force it all you want

    But the power is in no

    No to on and off again

    No to let’s just be friends

    No to ever seeing you again

    And I wish you the best now

    But I’m not in love with you

    And finally I’m free

    Only piece of you left with me

    Is that of my story

    A part of shaping me

    To be me

    And this is my success story

    If I can move on from you

    Can get over you

    Then to the ones who are crying over their exes too

    I promise you’ll find relief soon

    I promise you’ll have liberation

    Remember who you are

    And that you’ll find even more self love

    So keep present in the now and have faith in the future and the You who you’re yet to meet

    If you just let yourself let go and give yourself the gift of being free

    Believe

    Release

    And you’ll find your happy

    You deserve to be free and you’re not alone

    The future is just a moment of hope away,

    Keep remembering the sunshine that awaits

    And you’ll find it

    Sooner than you anticipate

    You’re not alone

    ❤️


    I hope you enjoyed this poetry by me!

    Have a blessed day,

    Love always,

    Jennie ❤️

    Poetry by me @50shad3s0fj4y Jennifer Ballard

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here and here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    ❤️

    Support The Blog. Thank you!

  • Romance Story

    Romance Story

    ‘Will you write a song about me?’

    There’s already a thousand in my heart just waiting for pen to reach paper

    Let me hold you in my arms, I’ll save the writing for later

    But for now

    Let me live these words

    As I twirl you

    Round

    We laugh

    The soundtrack of our beating hearts

    Is all

    We need

    To dance


    Thank you for reading!

    Lots of love,

    Jennie ❤️❤️❤️🌹

    Poetry by me @50shad3s0fj4y Jennifer Ballard.

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here and here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    Support The Blog. Thank you!

  • ‘Gods Masterpiece’ Spoken Poetry Video.

    ‘Gods Masterpiece’ Spoken Poetry Video.

    Hey Angels and welcome back to my blog.

    Today we have another spoken poetry video- this time for my poem – ‘Gods Masterpiece’ which is all about the beauty of nature / Mama Earth and OURSELVES! You can find the written version of this poem I wrote here, and of course, this post is for the video filled with all things nature-y!

    If you love poetry and nature, then I’m sure you will love this poetry video and of course, now is the perfect time for me to talk about todays sponsor – myself! ;P This blog post is sponsored by my ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ poetry e-magazine – which again if you love nature and poetry and the two combined then you will love this e-mag. Whilst there are poems ranging from all sorts of topics in this e-mag at least 7 of these poems feature a lot of nature vibes, two of the best being ‘Welcome To Wonderland’ and ‘Bali’ ❤️❤️ You can purchase the e-magazine from Etsy here.

    Now – enjoy the spoken poetry video – Gods Masterpiece. Have a blessed day!

    For more of my poetry, please click here.

    For more on all things Spirituality please click here.

    For business enquiries / to work with me, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Donate to the blog!

    Purchase my poetry e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    Have a blessed day! ❤️

  • Relationship Journals | How do I move on? | Poetry

    Relationship Journals | How do I move on? | Poetry

    Hey, sweet one. Todays poem that I will be sharing with you is one I wrote a long while ago now that I don’t believe I have shared anywhere before. I fucking love this. I was scrolling through my old blog posts the other night on 50shad3s0fj4y and I was so raw, so vulnerable. I used that blog like a journal and whilst I write with slightly different intentions now with a different approach I do miss that side of things. I probably won’t go back to diary style posts unless I naturally feel called to share a certain update however I am excited to share this poem that reminds me of my time documenting my relationship style experiences. I mean, perhaps the reason I don’t talk that much about relationships so much these days is because I’ve been single for a long time. I did ‘hang out’ with someone in 2020 and after arranging and rearranging a second ‘date’ he cancelled on me because of an injured leg meaning he didn’t want to go out and then I went to the pub the next evening and saw him. He did have a limp, but I don’t know if he was doing that for my benefit LOL.

    Anyway, this post isn’t about him so don’t worry I’m not deeping it over one date (although I have done. I wrote whole blog posts before about a boy I met twice – thanks for the inspiration), but as you will see by the end of the poem, there is a nice little conclusion!

    Enjoy! 😘


    You said

    It’s not goodbye just till next time

    I guess

    That next time’s never gon’ arrive

    A year has passed

    But you’re not my past

    Because you’re very much still present

    In my heart

    I still feel your heart

    But your heart’s moved on now

    So I wish you well

    Try and let you go

    Maybe I can move on too

    I’ll never understand

    How you took my hand

    And it’s still all I’m holding onto

    We said goodbye

    It made me cry

    And I knew I’d always love you

    But we can’t go back

    Next times off track

    I’ll keep on seeing these feelings through

    Till eventually I let go,

    Cut the cords

    Whilst forever giving thanks to you

    I want to move on

    Otherwise I’d never have said goodbye

    But I don’t want

    To ever forget

    The days of you and I

    So how do I move on

    Updated 3rd September 2021. I have now moved on 😀


    For full disclosure, is there ever really a conclusion? Energy lives on, and whilst I have moved on, no longer get emotional over the situation etc, not heartbroken or anything, (though still hope he is happy), I deffo have had a look at his facebook this year LOL.

    Anyway, this is your reminder that the heartbreak isn’t forever and is a path to something beautiful. I wouldn’t be me without my history. I hope you enjoyed this post!

    Mwah 😘

    Jennie ❤️🌹

    Poetry by me @50shad3s0fj4y Jennifer Ballard.

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here and here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    Support The Blog. Thank you!

  • Lilith Through The Looking Glass | Poetry

    Lilith Through The Looking Glass | Poetry

    You could say that I was shunned

    Better that than the trampled one

    Because I could never let my Spirit break

    So empowered as I walked away

    you can take this Earth

    Use my name

    To grow your pretty

    Flowers in

    False narrative that you spin

    Keep it all

    I am free

    Away from hatred and misogyny

    Found my people

    Who love me for me

    So grateful that

    I honoured myself

    Walked away

    Happiness unfurled

    So what people say

    Cannot phase me

    I know myself

    And I’m happy

    I applaud You to do

    What’s always best for You

    I only want the best for You

    May You feel empowered through and through

    ❤️

    Thank you for reading,

    Have a blessed day!

    Jennie

    ❤️

    Poetry by me @50shad3s0fj4y Jennifer Ballard.

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here and here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    Support The Blog. ❤️ Thank you!

  • New York Journals | Poetry

    New York Journals | Poetry

    ‘Like any great love, it keeps you guessing

    Like any real love, it’s ever-changing

    Like any true love, it drives you crazy

    But you know you wouldn’t change anything, anything, anything’ – Taylor Swift, Welcome To New York

    I love New York I do

    This has been the craziest few days

    I learnt so much

    What a mix of emotions honestly

    The first night

    I hated it

    All the people so annoying

    So busy

    Why is everyone everywhere

    I thought I couldn’t live here

    I couldn’t eat I felt sick I was tired

    I didn’t love the location of my hotel

    I would prefer somewhere more central

    Though the bed is super comfy and this still is pretty central where I stayed before was better but that could also be because I knew it already, a safety zone a comfort blanket because there is a subway station right by the hotel I’m in now

    But

    If you want to just wander around ‘town’ before bed then crowne plaza is better as it is way more central to times square than the hampton inn times square hotel, like, a much shorter walk into the center, I can’t remember exactly, but virtually two mins? Like, we are there

    Today I bought a cute hot dog Christmas bauble

    No matter what

    I fucking love the stories this trip holds

    It’s been hard

    I think

    For the past month this trip became hard

    Worrying about the money etc

    So silly

    BUT

    mmm

    I don’t know what to say

    I love New York

    So so much


    Poetry by me @50shad3s0fj4y Jennifer Ballard.

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here and here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    Support The Blog. ❤️ Thank you!

  • My Perspective On Insects + Spirit Animal Chats

    My Perspective On Insects + Spirit Animal Chats
    Insects are ANGELS. Crawling on our bodies flying around us we are surrounded by Angels

    What’s your perspective on insects? What’s your Spirit Animal? Mine is a dolphin, but recently I’ve experienced lots of connection with the rabbit symbol and turtles!

    I wrote the following caption for the following photo on my IG I believe at the beginning of 2021. I thought I would share it here too 😘

    Dolphin Love 🐬💙 Wearing all dolphin everything because they are my Spirit Animal, my bracelet is Larimar from @thepsychictree Larimar is known as the dolphin stone 💙😍 so of course I love it! I personally chose dolphins as my Spirit Animal after reading ‘The Power’ by @rhondabyrne_thesecret because I love them so much & they bring me joy! This outfit brings me joy 😅 For me, choosing dolphins as my Spirit Animal means that whenever I see a dolphin, or even just the word ‘dolphin’, I know I am in blissful alignment. If I have made a decision about something then see a dolphin, it’s confirmation that I’m on the right path, as well as bringing me joy & excitement, as when I see my dolphin Spirit Animal I know I am in alignment and blessings are happening and more joy is on its way! As well as choosing your Spirit Animal based on an animal you love, you could also do a meditation to meet your Spirit Animal/s, trust whatever flows to you.

    All animals are guiding us in some way, & they are all Spirit Animals, my lifetime Spirit Animal is a dolphin, however I allow what flows to guide me & to open myself up to messages from all Animal Guides through meditating or a certain animal showing up more frequently in my life… If you keep seeing a certain animal, it could have a positive message or positive guidance for you.

    What’s your Spirit Animal? 🐬

    I am excited to hear your perspectives and your Spirit Animal experiences in the comments below! Have a great day beautiful loved ones!

    Love,

    Jennie ❤️😘

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here and here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    Support The Blog. ❤️ Thank you!

  • Linger | Poetry

    Linger | Poetry

    You linger on my mind

    As the sunset delights

    And I think it’s funny how I remember your name

    Something so simple

    As buildings

    Turn Spiritual

    When they

    Remind me

    Of you

    You

    With your name

    That’s New York

    In my brain

    Because I never

    Forget

    About you

    But that’s just a habit

    Keep turning you magick

    By choosing you

    As my muse

    I hope my love

    Has reached you

    And painted you golden

    But dreaming about you has

    Grown old

    I’m ready for real love

    A romance that is built on

    Feelings of Real

    Divinity

    Step into Manhattan

    Head on my pillow

    Breaking the habit of thinking about you

    This is the last time

    You’ll be my muse

    Unless you ever

    Do

    Come through

    But for now

    I let go

    Of you

    I’m tired

    Of dreaming

    About you

    God bless You and I

    I wish us both

    Only

    The best

    I love you unconditionally

    But I got to get

    You

    Out

    Of my head


    I hope you enjoyed my poetry. Lots of love,

    Jennie

    Poetry by me @50shad3s0fj4y Jennifer Ballard.

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here and here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    Support The Blog. ❤️ Thank you!

  • If Taylor Swift…

    If Taylor Swift…

    If Taylor Swift is the New York of songwriting,

    I intend to be the New York of poetry

    Ps- we can all agree that ‘Cornelia Street’ is top tier Taylor Swift right? I used to not be able to listen to it so much because it made me too emotional but I love it. A masterpiece. I’ll probably cry even more now when I listen to it because it will make me miss New York however, I will be returning so…

    What is your favourite Taylor Swift song?

    Who is your favourite musical artist?

    Let me know in the comments below 😘

    Have a blessed day,

    Lots of love

    Jennie

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here and here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    For more on all things Spirituality, please click here and here.

    Support The Blog.  Thank you!

  • ‘Your Words Are Your Spell’ spoken poetry video.

    ‘Your Words Are Your Spell’ spoken poetry video.

    Hi baby, baby. Please read that ‘baby, baby’ in the sound of that song that goes ooh baby baby, because that’s what I’m thinking.

    Today I have a little spoken poetry reel I would like to share with you, this is for a poem I have written and shared both on Instagram and my original blog, 50shad3s0fjay. This reel has been shared on my tiktok account (which I used for about 5 days then deleted- standard me, I have a love hate relationship with social media, it’s all about the balance isn’t it and tiktok definitely lowered my vibes. For me what is working with IG currently is not taking it too seriously, not having a strong posting schedule as such, and deleting the app once I have posted what I want to post, along with having the days where I don’t use it – Sunday& Monday for example or if I’m on holiday – though not berating myself if I do decide to use it on those days, just being aware of how much time I’m spending on it and when it’s not making me feel good vibes anymore etc) but anyway, that was a tangent and a half – I created this beautiful spoken poetry video – and I hope you enjoy its magick but first!!! Let me talk about todays sponsor…

    It’s me 😇 I actually stole this idea from Leeor Alexandra when I saw how she was sponsoring her own YouTube videos through her courses / jewellery brand etc (which fyi just manifesting I would love to be sponsored by alchemybyla one day- in fact, my amulet from the brand is featured in the video I’ll be sharing – it’s the Cosmic Love amulet) and I thought it was such a flex, now I get to do this myself.

    Today’s blog post is sponsored by me and my etsy store – more specifically, my first ever poetry e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’, this e-magazine features over 30 poems, 34 of those poems being completely brand new and exclusive to the e-magazine 🥺 of course, this e-magazine features poems focusing on topics such as gratitude and love, appreciation for the beauty of life 😉 and all the magick of this Universe – it truly is so inspiring and I should probably read my own work more often, because there are so many reminders in this poetry about all the good life has to offer, and of course, there is poetry about romantic relationships too!

    You can purchase the e-magazine here or email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com to purchase your copy- just put the subject as ‘My Heart Sings’ and I’ll get back to you!

    Now, for the spoken poetry video, I hope you enjoy.

    Thank you for watching and reading,

    I’m wishing you such a love filled week, I really hope you feel love as you read this sentence, and feel a warm hug love energy in your heart.

    Lots of love

    Jennie

    ❤️

    Instagram: @50shad3s0fj4y

    For more of my poetry, please click here.

    To work with me / for business enquiries, please email me at JenniferRBallard222@yahoo.com

    Purchase my e-magazine ‘My Heart Sings / The Beauty Of Life’ here.

    For more on all things Spirituality, please click here.

    Support The Blog. ❤️ Thank you!

    ❤️❤️❤️ blessings.

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